some fun things…

coming in the next few months…

1. I’m going to Ft Lauderdale Florida November 1-6 for the Eleven Conference.

For those of you who don’t know…I was t h i s close to moving to South Florida in September to be a part of The Harbour Church and the prayer room they’re starting up. Some of my favorite people live there. It wasn’t the timing of the Lord though. However, I am very excited to visit and be a part of this conference.

2. I’ll being coming home for Christmas! December 19-26th. I’ve been missing my family and friends back home very much and can’t wait to see everyone. It won’t be a long visit though because I have to get back here for…

3.

I hear there’s a troop coming from MD for the conference. We have an abundant amount of floor space and I’m willing to share my bed with…Anna. Its gonna be fun! It’s gonna be cold! It’s gonna be on my 24th birthday! That’s right, if you don’t come…well you’re just not a true friend.

4. Shannon O’Leary is getting married!

January 2nd I’ll be heading BACK to Ft Lauderdale to be in her wedding on January 5th! woot! Man, I’m going to be broke…

5. January 28th-May 9th I will begin my intership with Intro to IHOP (which you can read about here). I’ve been praying about it for awhile and for the first time in the 10 months I’ve lived here, feel not only peace about the decision, but I actually have a lot of desire to do it. Those months are going to be pretty intense financially. The schedule is crazy and I’m not sure if I’m going to be able to hold a job during this time. However, I will be able to raise support and I will most likely continue to assist Corey. Please pray for me. For the Lord to send support and for the peace of God to rest on me as I learn to lean on Him as my Supporter.

6. I’m seeking the Lord about what happens after Intro is over…there are a few possibilities and dreams swimming in my head but I’ll wait until the Lord gives further directions to speak them.

A Testimony of Healing

I went to a Baptist High School. Our mascot was the Christian Crusader. I always thought that was weird…I don’t know if it was a reference to the Crusades or what…a little violent for a high school I think. Anyway, our verse was Ephesians 6:11-18, the whole armor of God verse that we all learned in Sunday School. It was something we read, we recited, we memorized…yet we didn’t KNOW it. It didn’t really mean anything. I’m sure we thought it did. I believed Jesus was real. I believed He died and rose again. I believed in God and the Devil, heaven and hell. I would say at that time that the Bible was God breathed and alive and active…because that’s what it says, right? It never ceases to amaze me how humans can give mental assent to “doctrine” and “facts” yet that doesn’t translate to true revelation that changes the way we live and feel. I’ve believed in God since before I can remember. Read the Bible front to back plenty of times. I’ve read it my whole life and yet the past 2 and a half years it’s felt like I’m reading it for the first time.

“Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.”

The “armor of God” isn’t cut out pieces of paper armor on a paper doll anymore (Don’t get me wrong, I’m fine with teaching children this way). It isn’t a school mascot. We have to move from milk to solid food. For the past 30 months I’ve had a crash course in the supernatural. There’s been a lot of craziness that I’d just have to talk to you about it person. I want to talk about these past two weeks though…

“For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.”

I had a lot of breakthrough spiritually a few weeks ago. Specifically the week of September 23rd. Things about my identity, who I am in God and who God is (a lot of what my last blog was about) was moving from my head to my heart. I was getting a lot of revelation about God as my Father and resting in His arms. That Thursday I was in Corey’s class in the afternoon. He talked about a lot but at the end was hitting John 13, “I will not leave you as orphans”. The Lord was exposing that spirit of fear where I think, “that’s for someone else, not for me”. There was this burning sensation/pressure in the middle of my head. I could actually feel the Lord breaking lies in my mind. Corey said something to the effect of, “there’s someone out there with pressure in the middle of their head, this is for you, you need to stand up and receive the healing of the Lord” haha…sometimes the Lord is so random in how He does things. A couple hours later I had a Spiritual Warfare and Deliverance class I’m taking with Stephen Beauchamp. More breakthrough there… Stephen prayed for me and rebuked the spirit of infirmity that’s been attacking me for the past 7 years. I woke up the next day with the worst pains in my abdomen I’ve felt…ever. I don’t know how, through revelation I suppose, but I just knew it was warfare. It was warfare all day, the pain came and went. I was able to work that night…kinda. Saturday I was in so much pain all I could do was lie in the fetal position. Sunday I thought I was going to die. It was ridicules. I even went to the emergency room so that they could tell me I was completely healthy and the cat scan showed nothing. The doctor said, “I mean, maybe you have some colitis or something…it’s very mild if you do” I knew what was wrong, there was a freaking demon in my colon. He gave me pain killers that literally did nothing. Codeine. No effect (well I was tired and felt high). Still all the pain though. How is that possible?

I don’t know what it is about sickness. I don’t know if it’s this way with everyone. I guess because I’ve struggled with so many random sicknesses for so long (I literally would get not-able-to-function sick every other month). It really takes a toll on my faith. Especially faith in God as my Father, as my provider, as my healer. Praying for healing is tough. There’s all this fear that it won’t happen…and then what? What if I pray and the Lord doesn’t heal me? What does that mean? Does he not care? I know He can do it but does He want to do it for me? It’s so much easier to believe in healing for someone else. I know God loves other people and he wants to heal other people, I just have a really hard time believing it for me. This has been the main struggle in my life, especially the past 2 and a half years. The sickness was a direct attack on the revelation I was getting about who the Lord is and how He looks at me.

“Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

Stand therefore, having girded your waist with truth, having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one.

And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God; praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints”

Wednesday, 6 days later, Stephen got a word of knowledge that the attack was an attack on my prayer life and I needed to intercede if I could. It is so hard to be in warring mode when you feel this way. I didn’t feel like I was warring. I just started to speak truth in my spirit about who the Lord is. Combating lie after lie…that He doesn’t really care about my sickness or oppression, that He doesn’t hear me, that He doesn’t want to do it right now, etc etc… Psalm 18 has been paradigm shifting for me about how the Lord reacts to the cry of our hearts. I’m going to hold back from quoting the entire scripture, but I encourage you to read and meditate on it…

“The pangs of death surrounded me,
And the floods of ungodliness made me afraid.
The sorrows of Sheol surrounded me;
The snares of death confronted me.
In my distress I called upon the LORD,
And cried out to my God;
He heard my voice from His temple,
And my cry came before Him, even to His ears.

Then the earth shook and trembled;
The foundations of the hills also quaked and were shaken,
Because He was angry.

He sent from above, He took me;
He drew me out of many waters.
He delivered me from my strong enemy,
From those who hated me,
For they were too strong for me.
They confronted me in the day of my calamity,
But the LORD was my support.
He also brought me out into a broad place;
He delivered me because He delighted in me.”

Psalm 18:4-7; 16-19

It didn’t feel like warfare in the natural. I was incredibly weak. But in my spirit things started to shift. Putting on the armor of God has taken on this whole new meaning. This is warfare. Praying continually is warfare. It’s what shifts things in the supernatural. Declaring God’s goodness, His faithfulness, His overwhelming love for me. I experienced a lot of the pain subsiding during my time in prayer. I also had a lot of people praying for me, especially that day.

I’d wanted to go to the healing rooms on Monday but they were closed because it was GBF week (Global Bridegroom Fast, a corporate fast we do the first Monday-Wednesday of the month) and everything shuts down. So the first time I could go was Thursday. I was the first person there, very ready and desperate (desperation is a great faith-feeder by the way…as is reading the Word). I was in sweats and probably looked amazing. Roni had to drive me because I was high. I was having a hard time walking and standing, waiting for the rooms to open up. Finally they sat me down to “soak”. This is when you just sit in the prayer room and people lay hands on you and pray silently while you just receive from the Lord. I actually think most of the sickness left then. Then they take you into a room with 3 other people, give you communion, ask if you want to repent of any sins (sometimes sickness is caused by sin issues or unforgiveness) and then they pray for you. Usually someone gets a word of knowledge about the origin of the sickness. They pray and encourage with words of knowledge and prophetic words. I walked in and instantly knew I was going to be healed completely when I left. After they prayed I even said “I’m healed, I’m going to stop taking my medication”. Of course they told me to be cautious and Spirit led. Since my meds were only for pain and not antibiotics or something else more important I had no issue just stopping. I went home and ate. I was so hungry, I hadn’t been eating because of how painful it was. Sure enough, no pain. I was healed. Praise the Lord! The next two days my intestines seemed a little sore but it didn’t hurt to eat.

Like most demonic forces, it tried to come back. Then it subsided for a couple days then yesterday it tried to come back with a force. I woke up this morning with a sore throat. I am in warfare mode, rebuking the heck out of it. I have a new boldness and holy anger towards the unclean thing now though.

I’m going to stop here. A blog about more of the supernatural to follow soon…

Good News

So I’ve been violently ill for the past week. I went to the emergency room on Sunday and found out I’m completely healthy. hmm… The doctor said I may have slight inflamation of my colon…but nothing I shouldn’t just sleep off. He gave me hardcore pain meds (which didn’t help at all) and sent me home. I felt like I was trying to digest glass. I don’t know if I’ve ever been in more pain in my life. Good news though…I went to the healing rooms here at IHOP and was miraculously healed on Thursday! I should say 98% healed. I seem to still have a little residual stuff going on… anyway, this healing has me thinking a lot about the supernatural…expect a blog this week about it.